One mother gave me birth and the other brought me up. I am more indebted to the latter who looked after me from the age 12 onwards. In fact she was my aunt, my father's sister, who had been a victim of child-marriage and was widowed in her youth. Her name was Mandhodari Budki which changed into Pranashuri Chowdhury after marriage. We fondly called her JIGREE. Her husband, I learnt was handsome and intelligent but didn't live long. She spent her days with her parents and later on with her sister but her greatness was that she loved her in-laws family which was joint and comprised more than 20 individuals at one time. Consequently, she was adored and respected by them all her life, so much so under divine intervention, she went to Jammu to visit her in-laws in 1988 and breathed her last there only. Though she had adopted her brother-in-law as her son, but the relationship was more a formality than emotional attachment. After my mother's death in 1962, when I was just 12, she joined our family and looked after her brother and 4 uncontrollable children, 3 girls and 1 boy.
Jigree was quiet, unassuming and pragmatic. She didn't like extravaganza and show-off. She was frugal and her eating habits were minimal, just a few morsels and that was all. No snacks, no tasty foods, and no temptations. An epitome of contentedness. She was wary of evil eye of the people. I remember once a distant Muslim neighbour asked her which class was I atudying in? She told her that I am uneducated and don't didn't know much about it. It is something after matriculation most probably. Surprisingly, I was in M Sc, Botany, her son was a professor in Botany and I used to often consult him. Jigree never scolded anyone or talked loudly to show her disapproval. Despite being uneducated, she was very intelligent and even elderly ladies, particularly from her in-laws would consult her for solving domestic problems and even seek guidance for living a better life. I have seen her advising a young lady to peel a bark from firewood, insert in her mouth and hold it tightly with her teeth whenever she anticipated wrath of her mother-in-law. On enquiring, she told me that since she wouldn't be able to reply back to her mother-in-law, the latter would get exhausted and stop frowning at her. In most cases it worked.
Many misfortunes visited our family. My father had three accidents one after the other during winter. First, he fell from his bicycle and broke his hip joint and femur bone. A doctor was consulted but matter became worse. One of our relations asked us to consult a person who by profession was making socks but was also a bone-setter for which he used herbs mostly after some resetting. He came, removed the plaster, pulled the leg a few times and then prescribed a number of herbs to be boiled and ground and put over the entire area. Then it was bandaged for 2 days. The process of boiling herbs was repeated and put on the hip repeatedly till the leg started moving as it recovered. After about a month my father was able to move but couldn't ride a bicycle. So he used to go to his office, a distance of 4-5 kms on foot everyday. One day, while returning, his shoe laces got loose, he raised his leg and placed it on the wooden plank of a shop to tighten it. No sooner did he keep his foot on the plank, a big sign board of the shop fell on his foot due to the heavily accumulated snow behind it. My father was writhing in pain, his foot was swollen due to fracture of bones and it looked like he had elephantiasis. Somehow, people managed to bring him home. Again the bone setter did a miracle and by March my father had recovered. Due to meagre salary and heavy expenditure, he couldn't afford to go by auto-ricksaws everyday. So, he again tried to ride the bicycle and after a few days had yet another fall but the injury was minor as compared to earlier one and he recovered soon. That whole winter was a nightmare for him and more than him, it was a nightmare for Jigree who left no stone unturned to nurse him, prepare the herbs, paste it on the injured area and bandage it heavily. She had to stay awake for many nights when her brother would cry due to unbearable pain. But Jigree managed it single-handedly and ensured her brother was back in business. Mother Teresa would have been no match to her.
I faced some turmoil at the time I had to appear for my M Sc previous examination. I decided to give up my studies and seek some job. She was startled. While she served me my breakfast one day, she asked me a question, "Why don't you want to appear in your examination?" In reply I gave my reasons. She was as cool as a cucumber and said, "Do you know why I have joined this family after your mother's death?" Without waiting for my answer, she continued, "It is for you and you alone. Your sisters will get married and go their way but you are the ultimate hope and beacon of my brother's family who will carry the legacy. You need to save my grey hair from disgrace. failure and dishonour." She didn't say anything more but it moved me and I reassembled my life and appeared in my examination. As a result, my one year was not wasted.
Even regarding my marriage, she had warned me of making a wrong choice. She gave her reasons but I didn't appreciate them at that time. The marriage proved a total failure and looking back I think my obduracy proved me wrong.
Her only regret in her life was that she was not educated. Had she been a matriculate, she could have got a decent job and lived her life independently and much more gracefully. But that was not to be. A song she often murmured, "Awaz de kahan hai, duniya meri jawan hai" The song reflected her emotions more than her autobiography could have done.
Apart from being indebted to her for whatever she did for me, I love her intensely and remember her at every moment of my life.
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